I'm Back!

 I started this blog in high school to post my work and showcase the poems I used to write as an escape from my reality. It used to be a way that I would explore myself but now at 25 years old, I am still unsure of who I am as a person. This blog may never be seen by anybody but that's okay because I am using it as my personal journal that will live on the internet. After years away, I have decided to come back to it, I miss writing and exploring myself in forms of poetry and that is exactly what I will do. 

One of the things I realised while I was away from this form of expression was that I used to write worrying about how people would critique it. That made it tiring and frustrating instead of the catharthic feeling that writing used to provide for me when I doodled on exam papers in class. Writing became something that needed to be perfect but now I realise there is no need for it. This latest poem was what I created when I got tired of all of it. Like always, I can never come up with good titles for my poems but here it is:


Life was never meant to be perfect

Perfection made me do things that were never worth it

I held on to the thought of perfection

Knuckles white until I lost all direction


Are the choices I made really mine?

Are they dreams of another left behind?

My head rages with conflicts that plague me

With questions of "Who am I meant to be?"


Life has made me scared of rejection

All I have known is to strive for perfection

Now writing gives me anxiety

Too scared about the quality 

I forget my own identity


Am I worthless if I can't excel?

This loop traps me in a cell


Too scared to start 

Too scared to fail 

Too scared to run


A coward that never thrives

A coward that finds it exhausting to survive

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